Starting last summer with Grandma's diagnosis and passing away; progressing with Grandpa's care; Ian's Lymphoma-no-wait-it's-Sarcoidosis; my ulnar neuritis circus of pain; and finally Grandpa's diagnosis and transition into hospice care. Plus the drugs that are supposed to help my inflammation wreak havoc on my body and mental state. Most times I think it'd be better to just deal with the pain, but when I stop the meds I nearly go crazy. Damned if I do, damned if I don't.
But it's not all bad. Ian is still wonderful with his beautiful blue eyes and warm smile; the puppies are always eager to give kisses and love; Mr.Poo deigns to let me pet him from time to time; the sun and moon continue to pass overhead through the seasons, and I'm alive to experience all these things.
I'm still optimistic, I still have Hope, I still want to experience everything life has in store for me. The secure foundations of my life have never changed, even when they pass to a place where I can no longer touch them, they are still there. Always.
In lighter news, I found a perfect little rooster for my new flock! A nice young woman in Petaluma had been keeping Roodle for a few months, but the landlord needed to rent one of the units and the rooster had to go. He is a handsome fellow, and is so happy with his little harem. I can't tell you how much I love hearing his crow! It's slightly different than LaRoo's (of course), but just as vibrant and proud. Hopefully in another month or two I can let them out for a little while each day, I just know they'll enjoy picking through all the tasty weeds and greenery.
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